Last night I couldn't sleep and so I stayed up and wrote a blog post. Just before I crawled into bed I thought about my son. He is working nights now in a rehab and it can be pretty quiet around 1:00 or 2:00 am so I decided to send him a text and say goodnight. 20 minutes later we were still texting. There were lots of "ha ha's" and the last text from him said, "I love you sleep well". I went to bed last night with a full heart. It felt good. For so many years I went to bed with a pain in my heart. It's been a long time since I really felt my sons love for me. Oh, I knew even when he was "on a run" that he loved me, but he was so much in the grips of his addiction that I only existed if he needed something. Yesterday OUT OF THE BLUE, he sent me something someone had posted on Instagram. It said;
"The more I grow,
the more I realize
that MY MOM is the best
best friend I ever had.
PS, I love my mom
Last night I went to bed with a full heart. Thanking god for the miracle of sobriety in my sons life and for the 12 step program that is helping me become a better mom. It's not the life I planned but it's the one God planned for me. Finding miracles in everyday moments.
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